underway

20 days. and healing is underway... i go hear mass tomorrow, for the first time since the accident... i have much to be thankful for... the physical one and the spiritual one... hope is sent in a way... a sparkle of clarity where there was only darkened uncertainty... i guess that is the most relieving of all things... since my burns are only superficial... meds can heal them and as the body has a self-healing mechanism... i am sure of things renewing... but the burning thoughts. they are the hardest to ignore... physical pain doesn't bother as much when one is asleep but mental and emotional ones seep into ones being even during sleep... i am thankful that God has kept His silence... for i have discerned that in not pushing things... everything falls into place... as GCF noted in one of the articles in her book, a spiritual pillow book -- "everything had come into place... as it always does when you do not try to control, if you just wait." in the coming weeks, i begin yet again... a new chapter... how many beginnings am i allowed to have? it seems that all my starts never had completions nor endings... just an eternal continuity of things... overlapping, intertwining and intersecting... of lives and selves and thoughts and moments... nothing certain but uncertainty... and the faith and trust in God that my little soul is banking on... i am okay. all is well. what is there to fear? nothing more. God is with me in all these. thank you, dear Lord, my strength!